January 2012
64 posts
Someone told me today that I've done a lot of...
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Eric
My brother is being a douche again. Lets go, Eric. I can do this better than you can. You know why? Because I’m better than you. Humans are created equal but I’m above you.
You can plead your shitty case but if you don’t respect me, I’m damn well going to treat you like shit. Say your meaningless words.
» Right now, I’m putting the TV on 40 / (prolly 100)....
Playing With Telemarketers
I was at home the other night in the middle of my dinner when the phone rang.
ME: Hello.
AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T.
ME: Is this AT&T.
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: This is AT&T.
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: Is this AT&T.?
AT&T: Yes! This is AT&T, may I speak to Mr. Byron, please?
ME: May I ask who is calling?
AT&T: This is AT&T.
ME: OK, hold on.
At this point I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. I ate my salad. Much to my surprise, when I picked up the receiver, they were still waiting.
ME: Hello?
AT&T: Is this Mr. Byron?
ME: May I ask who is calling, please?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: The phone company.
AT&T: Yes, sir.
ME: I thought you said this was AT&T.
AT&T: Yes, sir, we are a phone company.
ME: I already have a phone.
AT&T: We aren't selling phones today, Mr. Byron. We would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
ME: Now, that's 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day?
AT&T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes, sir, that's right! 24 hours a day!
ME: 7 days a week.?
AT&T: That's right.
ME: 365 days a year.?
AT&T: Yes, sir.
ME: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!!! That's amazing!
AT&T: We think so!
ME: That's quite a sum of money!
AT&T: Yes, sir, it's amazing how it adds up.
ME: OK, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big one at the end of the year for the full $52,560; and if you send an annual check, can I get a cash advance?
AT&T: Excuse me?
ME: You know, the 10 cents a minute.
AT&T: What are you talking about?
ME: You said you'd give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1008 per week and $52,560 per year. I'm just interested in knowing how you will be making payment.
AT&T: Oh, no, sir. I didn't mean we'd be paying you. You pay us 10 cents a minute.
ME: Wait a minute, how do you figure that by saying that you'll give me 10 cents a minute, that I'll give YOU 10 cents a minute? Is this some kind of subliminal telemarketing scheme? I've read about things like this in the Enquirer, you know.
AT&T: No, sir, we are offering 10 cents a minute for
ME: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! Can I speak to a supervisor please?
AT&T: Sir, I don't think that is necessary.
ME: I insist on speaking to a supervisor!
AT&T: Yes, Mr. Byron. Please hold.
At this point, I begin trying to finish my dinner.
SUPERVISOR: Mr. Byron?
ME: Yeah.
SUPERVISOR: I understand you are not quite understanding our 10 cents a minute program.
ME: Is This A T &T?
SUPERVISOR: Yes, sir, it sure is.
ME: (I had to swallow before I choked on my food. It was all I could do to suppress my laughter and I had to be Careful not to produce a snort.) No, actually, I was just waiting for someone to
get back to me so that I could sign up for the plan.
SUPERVISOR: Ok, no problem, I'll transfer you back to the person who was helping you.
ME: Thank you.
I was on hold once again and managed a few more mouthfuls. I need to end this conversation. Suddenly, there was an aggravated but polite voice at the other end of the phone.
AT&T: Hello, Mr. Byron, I understand that you are interested in signing up for our plan.?
ME: No, but I was wondering - do you have that "Friends and Family"
thing because I'm an only child and I'd really like to have a little brother...
AT&T: click........
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I may not be the most attractive person, but I do...
Anonymous asked: L and Z.
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FSU v. Jesse
Jan. 16 : Jesse’s Bday.
Comparably, good day. It was moderately exciting, as the highlight of the day was merely meeting the people rather than the events. Spent a lot of gas and time driving around the surrounding cities.
Started with eating food and then meeting a female, Savannah.
Seemingly harmless, we travelled onto meet a spectacular Muslim female, Kheira. She was great to...
Sushi
Craves, going to Stater Bros in search of it.
Hope they have it.
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2012 : Give rise to 9gag.com
The trolling bus driver
xxannie4life95xx:
molybdenum42:
laughing-sister:
This story needs to be shared.
I need to meet this man.
Omg!
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Facebook
I hate, when I make a quality status, that the notifications come for hours.
=__=
Mental Hangover
[2+2=?]
WHAT THE FUCK ? :[
Pulling an all nighter
This homework proved to be more troublesome than it’s worth.
Working on History note cards. I should have started earlier, but no use worrying now, huh?
Starbucks
An invaluable resource. I don’t care how mainstream this place is, you get work done here. I just applied for 5 locations, hoping for an interview. I really like this place and could hope for discounts as I drink enough coffee here as it is. I can benefit from a job and discounts from a place I love.
I’m working on essays for the day, and then history homework. Going to finish today,...
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Future reference, Essay Writing.
1. Speaker, Occasion, and Subject
(Writer’s credentials), (writer’s first and last name), in his/her (type of text), (title of text), (strong verb) (writer’s subject).
2. Purpose
(Writer’s last name)’s purpose is to (what the writer does in the text).
3. Audience
He/she adopts a[n] (Blank [and/yet/but] Blank) tone and diction that speaks to (What diction speaks to) in order to (verb phrase...
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Dad
I want to know why you are so intrigued by illegal drugs.
If someone tells me “No”, I want to ask “Why?”.
Need a girlfriend -.-
I fap way too much. God, It’s a ritual.
I do it before I sleep, if I’m studying, if I get bored… etc.
I just need a girl to do it for me, I’m starting to look kind of weird with one arm bigger than the other…
It's times like these
Where I really amaze myself. I know at times like these that I can do anything.
It’s just hell going through my cycles of doing my work.
Sororities
Sororities are hot girl’s chances to strike gold with the nerds.
Christian Rock.
Feeds my soul.
Getting my daily dose of Jesus
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I'm not afraid to die.
I’m afraid of how I would hurt everyone by leaving without a goodbye.
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@Everything_High: California Marijuana Laws →
everythinghigh:
As of January 1, 2011, possession of one ounce (28.5 gms) or less of marijuana is an infraction, punishable by a maximum $100 fine (plus fees) with no criminal record under Ca Health & Safety Code 11357b.
(Prior to 2011, possession of one ounce or less of marijuana was a misdemeanor, but…
One bill or less ;D
Who's from San Francisco?
Let’s chat :D
Fucking call of duty
omg this game is so repetitive. Just the fast paced transitions absorb you in and leave you with nothing.